Why I don't normally listen to the news - but am thankful for journalism

I don't listen to the news. I don't watch CNN, Fox, or any news channel. Occasionally I will glance at the NY times or CNN. Why do you ask? In one word - negativity.

The news media excels in making us aware of all the negative things going in the world. From terrorism, to the obesity epidemic, to the attention deficit order, to floods etc. Hardly ever does one see a positive piece of news. And why so? Negative news sells. Negative news makes people angry, and turn back into the channel. Negative news can be sensationalized.

Now I don't want to pretend that  burying my head in the sand is the answer. But I do think that most people pay too much attention to the news. I find a balance by occasionally glancing at the news, and knowing enough to make important decisions e.g., who to vote for. But that is what I want to limit it to. I would rather spend time with family, read tech blogs, work hard at my job, and generally remain happy, than remain 'informed.'

One exception - the recent Boston acts of terrorism. That is the one time I was thankful for journalists, and news sources such as NPR. Not Twitter, NPR. Why? NPR, and other news outlets check their sources. Twitter was already abuzz with rumours 30 minutes after the incident  12 dead, while only 2 people were confirmed dead. And so on and so forth.

So thanks for journalism and the news media for keeping us informed when it counts. In most other days though, I shall continue to ignore 90% of what you say.

Insecurity Work

Re-Posted from my blog Business CoFounder

Insecurity work

I read a very interesting post the other day by Tony Schwartz, founder of the Energy Project, called ‘Take back your life in seven Simple Steps.’ First of all, let me say that the steps look simple, but implementing them is anything but simple.
The part that stood out to me was the description of what he called ‘Insecurity Work.’ Insecurity work is the ‘check in’ work we do everything every day - work that gives us an instant sense of progress, but does not contribute to the achievement of our goals. Examples:

 - Check email - wow, 7 new messages. I must be important!

 - Check Klout score - man, I am super influential

 - Check Google Analytics - wow, 30% increase in day over day hits on my blog

This work needs to get done. But it need not interrupt us all the time. The video below has some excellent tips by Scott Belsky, the creator of the term, and author of ‘Making Ideas Happen.’ Simply be aware of when you are doing it, compartmentalize it, and batch it so that you are doing all this work together, in a 30-minute time when your energy is too low to do other, more productive work.
Sounds simple - but isn’t. It is much easier to do work that provides instant gratification, and much harder to put it off. But being aware of when it happens, and working slowly in the direction of changing things is a start.

I am personally working on this with the use of tools such as StayFocusd and LeechBlock that automatically block, or limit activities such as Facebook, personal email checks etc. So wish me luck!

It’s time to Gamify the To-do list

Reposted from my new Blog 'The Business Cofounder.'

I am a strong J. That means that my fourth MBTI type is Judging - leading to me preferring a structured approach to life. One of the most important ways I keep my life organized? With my To-do list, using my favorite tool, Toodledo.

My To-do list is not just a To-do list, it is organized by Context (where I am/what I can do - e.g., Work, Home, On the Phone), Priority, Start Date, Due date, Goal/Project etc. So at any point in time, I can easily pull up things I can/want to do. And I try to clump things together, to maintain a rythm - e.g., if I am feeling focused, I will pull up specifically tasks for which I need a certain level of concentration. If I am sending emails, I will batch the effort and send 5 emails instead of 1.

The conflict

But as I ponder over my To-do list, I realize that it is also a big reason for my unhappiness. And not
just my unhappiness, but the unhappiness and dissatisfaction. Let me explain.
I - along with most people I know- maintain a to-do list that shows them what remains to be done. And rightfully so - who would I waste precious screen space that shows me what I don’t need to worry about? Also, most people have way more to do than what they could possibly do. Every time a task is completed, it disappears from the list; all that is left is what’s remaining to be done.
Boy, what a miserable existence! What if a video game, rather than showing you how many points you have earned, shows you - 10 levels left. How long do you think would you play the game?

That’s where Gamification comes in

If you have never heard of Gamification - it is the application of game mechanics to enhance non-game contexts. Or in layman’s terms - what if we approached every problem to be solved with the lens of converting it into something more like a game?

What might happen if I gamified a To-do list? Here are some ideas:

1. A score - A score, or an achievement is the physical representation of having accomplished something. It keeps you focused on not just what you have left to do, but how much you have accomplished!
In this case, I would not do a linear score, but a more complex one - rewarding you much more for important tasks than simple ones (so writing a blog post might get a few more points than emptying the trash)

2. Levels - Levels are a system, or “ramp”, by which players are rewarded an increasing value for a cumulation of points. If you have already been pretty productive today, you level up - and hence get more points than on an ordinary day

3. Progression - or how much of the work that I set out to do have I done? This is just like the LinkedIn progress bar that shows you what %age of your profile you have completed, motivating you to finish it

4. Social - Yes, I will make it social - in a way that helps your friends provide support and encouragement for finishing things - especially important tasks that require concentration, taking risks and persistence.

5. Analytics - a very important side effect of this type of gamification will be analytics. For example, when are you most productive? When are you able to do tasks that require a high degree of concentration? Consequentially, how should you change behavior e.g., focus on important tasks in the morning than checking email?

6. Last, but not least, battling the monsters - We all battle with a big monster while completing work - the procrastination monster. It is not that we are inherently lazy - it is that our Lizard Brain is telling us not to take risks, to stay in our comfort zone.
I would love to hear from anyone who has seen such an app/working on one. Or I might just work on one myself…

Being a dad

The other day, I was talking to my dad. He had just looked at some of Simran's (my daughter) pictures and videos on Facebook. He told me how much he loves watching her videos and pictures, and she had totally overshadowed all the children he had seen - including me. In fact, after watching her, the memories of me had been replaced by her (he said it in jest, of course).

Now that I think about me, I imaging that at that point I might have felt jealous, angry - how could the memories of my childhood have been replaced by anyone? But all I felt was - happiness. Intense Pride. Joy.

I guess that's what being a dad is like. Your children might overshadow you, excel in life more than you had ever done - and you hope that happens. And if that happens, you feel just intense pride and joy. But above all, you hope and pray that they are happy - always. And there is no joy like seeing them happy.

Improve your emotional resilience

Watch this

Wondering how it improved your emotional resilience? Answer here

The Network

Reposted from by new Blog, the Business CoFounder

Networking gets a bad rap unnecessarily. Think of what picture comes to mind, when you say ‘networker?’ Is it a slick haired, smooth talking fellow, nicely dressed, extroverted, skillfully finding the most important people at a cocktail party, ready to impress them and hand them his business card?

For me, my network is just a group of friends and acquaintances, who help me, and who I help. My approach to networking is simple - in any opportunity to meet and network with people, I am always thinking - who can I help here? Yes, some of it is because of the goodness of my heart! But some of it is that I strongly believe in the principle of reciprocity - if you help someone, they must help you. In words of Dr. Cialdini (world famous Professor of Psychology, and arguably the world’s most well known expert on Influence) “Society works because of the principle of reciprocity - people can freely exchange resources, because they know that they are not giving them away. When they need them, they will receive them back in return.” And it’s not that I keep a count who I asked for favors from, and who I gave favors to. There are people who have helped me immeasurably, and I have hardly ever done anything for them. And there are some people who I have helped more. It all adds up in the end in a giant pool of reciprocity.

But the more your network grows, the harder it is to keep in touch with everyone. I try to keep in touch with some means:
1. Email Reconnect - every year, I try to send an update to whoever I think might be interested in hearing from me. It works great, and people update me with what’s going on in their lives, call me etc.
2. Commenting on posts on LinkedIn, Facebook
3. Sharing articles - whenever I come across something useful for someone, I share it with them
4. Making introductions is a great way, as in my mind, you are doing something good for the person who wants to be introduced to someone, and the someone who he/she wants to be introduced to (as long as the match is appropriate). Always do check with both people before you actually send out an introduction emails
5. What I am terrible at is actually calling people - definitely need to get better at this

Enter Technology
Technology related to networking has been there for a while, from address book utilities like Plaxo, to email software like Xobni.
Recently though I have come across other technology that could take building and maintaining a network one step forward. Let’s look at some of them.

• Cloze is a promising ‘interaction organizer’ that adds a context for every conversation. I have not been able to try the software yet, but based on their video, it does sounds promising. The idea is simple - aggregate all contact info, conversations, and present them when it matters (e.g., when you are email a person, talking to them etc.). The MA based company has raised $1.2M, and is in private beta.
• Another interesting company is NetworksIgnite, started by my friend from Kellogg, Rajus Korde. The company attempts to answer the question - when should you follow up?
• There have been several apps to meet people/network at conferences such as Plug from Mobinett, Pathable etc.
• Apps that try to eliminate business cards, like Bump and a variety of others. None of these appears to have succeeded though, as there hasn’t been a single platform that everyone has moved to.

So what’s next? Well, I continue to watch for new technology in this space - still seems like a lot of potential to innovate. And networking - that continues too, with friends and acquaintances, old and new. Till then? Stay thirsty, my friend.

The Human Predicament

We all suffer from the great human predicament. In search of happiness, we work hard to achieve more and acquire more things - wealth, status, power. But our mind is incredibly at adjusting to the 'new normal..'. Research shows that someone having suffered from a catastrophic event - like having lost a leg - is about as happy as someone who won the lottery, six months after the event. 

People who are happy, are not happy because of success. They are happy because they are either naturally inclined to be happy, or choose to be happy (or both). In fact, happiness is more tried to effort than to outcomes. 

I am no master of human happiness - but I am a student of human happiness. Hopefully you too are, and want to be, a student of human happiness. Want to know where to begin? Just ask me. 

Forming a Peer Group in Boston

Earlier this year, I was reading a book called the Accidental Creative. The author said that his greatest piece of advice for creatives is to start a small group that keeps you focused and engaged on your work. This compelled me to re-read Who's Got Your Back. Apparently Core Groups have been in existence longer than most people think; Benjamin Franklin belong to a Core Group called Junto. Thomas Edison, Henry Ford and Harvey Firestone belonged to a Mastermind Group.

Now One of my big, short term goals? To form a Peer Group in Boston.

What is a Peer Group?

The idea is simple - a Peer Group (aka Core Group, Mastermind Groups, Personal Board of Directors) is a small, professional group that meets regularly, and in which members offer each other advice and encouragement. The advantages are many:

1. Accountability: If people hold you accountable, you are more likely to achieve your goals; especially if you need to answer publicly to a group of six of your peers
2. Encouragement:  Peer Groups are designed to encourage its members to strive towards their goals, to explore things they are passionate about, to stay motivated.
3. An outside perspective
4. Motivation: For me, this is the biggest factor. Whenever I have had career discussions with peers or mentors, I have always come out feeling energized

My quest for a Peer Group

I am largely looking at People I already know and respect, though I would be open to others, especially people who are known and respected by people I know and respect. They need to be interested in Technology and Entrepreneurship for us to have at least some common goals. I plan to hold monthly meetings, and more informal get-togethers. Will keep y'all posted on how it goes!

Relentless resourcefulness: the What, Why and How

 Reposted from my new Blog, The Business Co-Founder

The most important quality of an Entrepreneur is relentless resourcefulness; even Paul Graham agrees. In this post, I will cover
1. What is relentless resourcefulness?
2. Why is it important?
3. How do you build it?
So let’s start.

What is relentless resourcefulness?
The dictionary defines resourceful as ‘Able to act effectively or imaginatively, especially in difficult situations.’ Relentless resourcefulness is simply resourcefulness + perseverance - or applying resourcefulness continuously, without giving up.

Why is it important for Entrepreneurs?
In startups, you will continuously come across situations that pose novel, difficult problems, for which there is no easy, obvious solution, and which force most people to give up. Only if you are relentlessly resourceful will you overcome these challenges, and not give up. This might take various forms e.g., your funding round did not come through - how do you become creative and bootstrap for another three months? OR your customer development interviews showed that your target market has no need for your product - how and where do you pivot?

How do you build it?
This Life Hacker article gave me the following equation, that makes complete sense
Resourcefulness = Necessity + Creativity + Persistence
So the only way to build resourcefulness is to build each of the constituent qualities.

Necessity
Though not a quality, necessity signifies that you are most resourceful when you need to. This is why people often tell Entrepreneurs to quit their job; when you have no fallback, you become more resourceful.

Creativity
You might not consider yourself very creative, but there is a big difference in the different kinds of creativity. As a blog post I wrote a while ago, Conceptual Creativity is what you need to be successful in Business. There are several interesting books you can read on this topic (list below). But here are my favorite tactics:

• Question everything - try to look at the underlying assumptions and see what happens if you reverse them
• Look for outliers and anomalies
• When generating ideas, start with one idea - any idea, no matter how stupid. That gets your mind going
• Think of ideas alone before and group sessions - group sessions encourage group think
• Have fun and believe that you are creative

Persistence
While there are several ways to be persistent (and tons of articles and Quora Answers on persistence/perseverance), I believe in one way more than any other way: Invest in the process, not the Outcome. No matter how much we believe in our qualities, our ability to change the world, the truth of the matter is that several circumstances are outside our control. ‘Luck’ plays a part - a huge part - in the success or failure of any endeavor. Market dynamics change, unforeseen things happen. The idea is the be emotionally tied to the process, and not the outcome. That way, you will not give up when you are faced with obstacles, because you did the best you could, and be truly, persistently, persistence


Further Reading: Creativity
The Innovator’s DNA: Mastering the Five Skills of Disruptive Innovators
Disciplined Dreaming: A Proven System to Drive Breakthrough Creativity
The Riddle: Where Ideas Come From and How to Have Better Ones
Further Reading: Persistence
Are You Ready to Succeed? Unconventional Strategies to Achieving Personal Mastery in Business and Life

The woman at the grocery store

There is a Stop and Shop in Arlington where I buy groceries - once a week or so. Most of my interactions with cashiers at the checkout counter are pretty normal - say hello, ask how you are, tell them that I want paper and plastic bags (or use the bags I brought), get groceries packed efficiently and go out of the way.

This woman - who's name was Ami - was different. She said hullo to me, and asked where the Mrs. was. Now I did not remember Ami - but she remembered my wife and I. When I told her that the Mrs. was at home, with the baby, she said that oh yes, she remembered that last time she ran into us, my wife Kerri was pregnant. Since Simran has turned 5 months ago, the incident was more than 5 months ago, likely longer. I got home, and asked Kerri if she remembered Ami - she did.

Why am I saying all this? It's simple - Ami tries to remember all her customers, takes interest in their lives, is pleasant. She doesn't do this with an objective in mind - she does not get paid any more for being friendly. She does it out of a choice - it makes her happier, it makes other people happier. And it's the right thing to do.

We often get caught in a vicious cycle - thinking that things will make us happy. A bigger house, a fancy car, a promotion etc. Happiness is a choice. The foremost drive of happiness - our own inner self-talk, and our relationships with others - which are also majorly affected by our own inner self-talk. So start with being happy - and other things will come into your life when they are supposed to.